Alive

Wow. Thanks for all the love and support! I've got a reader full of great blogs again thanks to all your comments.

This weekend we headed out to western Maryland for a ski trip with a bunch of our friends. We had a great time. Make that an amazing time. I even went skiing and have a nasty bruise on my leg to prove it. I cooked all the meals for our "family dinners", we played lots of games, watched lots of football, and spent many hours in the hot tub. We also killed more cases of beer than I care to admit, but everyone needs to let loose now and then, right?? Don't worry, I'm detoxing this week.

The best part is that I didn't think about my miscarriage almost the entire trip. I was lying in bed Sunday afternoon after we returned from skiing and realized that I had not thought about miscarrying once. And in that moment when I did start thinking about it, I didn't cry. I just reflected on the fact that it happened, but I wasn't overwhelmed with sadness. As I continued thinking, I actually felt like I was on a trip to have fun, not that I was on a trip to help me forget about everything that has happened. That's an additional crappy thing about going through something traumatic...you are in a daze for a while. You do things and go through life because you have to, instead of actually living your life. I felt alive this weekend. That's progress.